One Year Later...

I can hardly believe a year has passed. So much has happened in such a short time. Every day was a different emotion. I never knew what the day was going to bring. Is today going to be a good day or not. It was very difficult living like that. I hurt all the time even on the good days. I felt very alone, angry, sad, confused, frustrated, scared and at times stupid. But at least I felt something, I wasn't numb anymore. I couldn't eat, I couldn't sleep I couldn't DO anything it seemed. My mind was never where it was supposed to be. I look back at all those days and it's like they were surrounded in a fog and I was on auto-pilot. The only thing that got me through were those brief moments when nothing else mattered. They were the reason I kept holding on.

Fast forward one year later...

Things could not be more different today than they were then. So much has changed even my name! This past week marked the ending of a very difficult and emotional time in my life. I am so relieved. For the first time is such a long time I am truely happy. I feel like everything I went through this past year has brought me to where I am today and I am exactly where I want to be. Someone once told me the hardest part of anything is going through it. You can't build a bridge over it, you can't dig a tunnel under it and you can't go around it. You have to go THROUGH it and once you do and look back from the other side things don't seem so bad after all.

OK so maybe it still seemed bad.. but worth it.